Bert took his dog to the vet: "Doctor," he said sadly, "I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to cut off my dog's tail."
The vet stepped back: "Bert, why should I do such a terrible thing?" Bert replied: "Because my mother-in-law's arriving tomorrow, and I don't want anything to make her think she's welcome."

Have a nice evening

kk

.Four Fruits: In a contest, four fruits (an apple, a banana, an orange, and a pear) have been placed in four closed boxes (one fruit per box). People may guess which fruit is in which box. 123 people participate in the contest. When the boxes are opened, it turns out that 43 people have guessed none of the fruits correctly, 39 people have guessed one fruit correctly, and 31 people have guessed two fruits correctly.
- The Riddle:
.How many people have guessed three fruits correctly, and how many people have guessed four fruits correctly?

Good luck, I promise i'l tell you the answer, cz i know it

.And for more fun, here's a joke:
- " Won The Lottery "
A Redneck buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Austin to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number. The Redneck says, "I want my $20 million."
The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn't work that way. We give you a million today and then you'll get the rest spread out for the next 19 years."
The Redneck said, "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it."
Again, the man explain that he would only get a million that day and the rest during the next 19 years.
The Redneck, furious with the man, screams out, "Look, I want my money! If you're not going to give me my $20 million right now, then I want my dollar back!"

xx
kk

Well here it goes..we're needing jokes anyhow, so have fun:
-What Men Really Mean?
1. "It's a guy thing."
Really means...."There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."
2. "Can I help with dinner?"
Really means...."Why isn't it already on the table?"
3. "Uh huh," "Sure, honey," or "Yes, dear."
Really means....Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.
4. "It would take too long to explain."
Really means..."I have no idea how it works. ( this one i was sure about it )
5. "We're going to be late."
Really means...."Now I have a legitimate excuse to drive like a maniac."
6. "Take a break, honey, you're working too hard."
Really means...."I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."
7. "That's interesting, dear."
Really means...."Are you still talking?"
8. "It's a really good movie."
Really means...."It's got guns, knives, fast cars, and beautiful women."
9. "That's women's work."
Really means...."It's difficult, dirty, and thankless."
10. "You know how bad my memory is."
"Really means.... "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first girl I ever kissed and the Vehicle Identification Numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."
11. "I was just thinking about you, and got you these roses."
Really means.... "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe."
12. "Oh, don't fuss. I just cut myself, it's no big deal."
Really means.... "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit I'm hurt."D
13. "Hey, I've got my reasons for what I'm doing."
Really means.... "...And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."
14. "I can't find it."
Really means.... "It didn't fall right into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."
15. "What did I do this time?"
Really means.... "What did you catch me at?"
16. "I heard you."
Really means.... "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."
17. "You know I could never love anyone else."
Really means.... "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."
18. "You look terrific."
Really means.... "Oh, God, please don't try on one more outfit. I'm starving."D
19. "I'm not lost. I know exactly where we are."
Really means.... "No one will ever see us alive again."
20. "We share the housework."
Really means.... "I make the messes, she cleans them up."

Have fun,

KK

Goooooooood Morning P.
I wish you a happy day and all the best in your life

PS. If you want to give him your best wishes, his blog is: www.stroke.blog.co.uk

HUGS,
Have a great day,
KK

The climate is really messed! Yesterday, after almost exactly one year...January 29th,2006 snowed in Lisbon... i saw snow in Lisbon for the second time in my life; my granny says is the 3rd. time she hears about it! Check out this images:


Amazing huh? Too cold indeed around here, we're living extreme climate changes!
Have a good day

kk

UUUUUUUFFFF Is the 3rd. time i try post this one! Maybe because is so cold and rainny, i'm not managing share with you this Hawain beach..well choosed eh?
I want and i can have one in my blog, hope now is posted!
Have a great day,
kk

There is a story about a princess who had a small eye problem that she felt was really bad. Being the king's daughter, she was rather spoiled and kept crying all the time. When the doctors wanted to apply medicine, she would invariably refuse any medical treatment and kept touching the sore spot on her eye. In this way it became worse and worse, until finally the king proclaimed a large reward for whoever could cure his daughter. After some time, a man arrived who claimed to be a famous physician, but actually was not even a doctor.

He declared that he could definitely cure the princess and was admitted to her chamber. After he had examined her, he exclaimed, "Oh, I'm so sorry!" "What is it?" the princess inquired. The doctor said, "There is nothing much wrong with your eye, but there is something else that is really serious." The princess was alarmed and asked, "What on earth is so serious?" He hesitated and said, "It is really bad. I shouldn't tell you about it." No matter how much she insisted, he refused to tell her, saying that he could not speak without the king's permission.

When the king arrived, the doctor was still reluctant to reveal his findings. Finally the king commanded, "Tell us what is wrong. Whatever it is, you have to tell us!" At last the doctor said, "Well, the eye will get better within a few days - that is no problem. The big problem is that the princess will grow a tail, which will become at least nine fathoms long. It may start growing very soon. If she can detect the first moment it appears, I might be able to prevent it from growing." At this news everyone was deeply concerned. And the princess, what did she do? She stayed in bed, day and night, directing all her attention to detecting when the tail might appear. Thus, after a few days, her eye got well.

This shows how we usually react. We focus on our little problem and it becomes the center around which everything else revolves. So far, we have done this repeatedly, life after life. We think, "My wishes, my interests, my likes and dislikes come first!" As long as we function on this basis, we will remain unchanged...as long as attachment and aversion are our sources of living and drive us onward, we cannot rest.

- Buddhist story

... well, for me is something scratching! Is really annoying! I hardly believe that is the sound of someone vomiting! Trevor Cox, an english teacher researched about it, and asked around the internet which is the worst sound for a human being, and he discovered most replied it is the sound of someone vomiting.
That sound doesn't annoy me at all! But when i hear something scratching, wow, it really drives me
And for you?
Have a great Sunday,

kk

1.Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you?
But when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window.
-Steve Bluestone

2.Grant me the stubbornness to change what I can, the laziness to accept what I cannot, and enough beer to sit around and endlessly discuss the difference between the two.
-Dick Dunn

3.Anytime you point the finger of blame someone, remember that there are 4 fingers pointing back at you.

Have a nice day

kk

I enjoy a lot this photo, i borrowed it last year from P./LL, with the sun and the moon, plus their reflections on the ice!
Have a nice sleep,

xxx
kk

PS: if you click on the image it enlarges.

Don't try to know!
I was so bored last weekend, that i decided to play with my mobile phone and see how it looks in another language, but one with funny characters..was about to choose Chinese, when i clicked on " Svenska "
I still don't know if it's Russian or Swedish, i just know that i learned some words i can't even spell, and instead of find it funny i found it annoying, because i forgot to note down the steps, and when i wanted it back in my language or one i know, after check how it looks in " Svenska ", i didn't know the way back
So, yesterday's night...yes, my phone  was yet in " svenska ".. as i was only managing replying some texts, nothing much else because i didn't know the words in my own phone .. i decided to focus my mind on it and finally i managed it, i got it in portuguese..but don't know how, i just know that i clicked in every icon i saw and about 11h.pm i got it back
" Tillbaka " is one word in " Svenska " i'l not forget! Because was all the time appearing, just now i now it means " back "
LOL, so don't try play with this at all, is my advice  is very frustrating  not have our own mobile phone in our language, or one we know!
Have a great day, is thursday already...bit rainny and cold, but almost w/e.,

xxx
kk

 It says is busy, eh? How can it be? I want to work online and  it's busy!
Grrrrrrrrrrrr..
xx
kk

This is too much cold! 1+d in Lisbon, right now, i switched on all the heatings already, when woke up! Who asked the poles to send us this cold? And this icy wind  ?
How much cold are you having up there?
We'l have snow again in Lisbon as last year, this is very unsual!
And really too cold for me!
Have a great day,


xx
kk

"What's that behind my car?" LOL, i can only think on this watching this picture!
I'm sure if this happens to me, i'l really fly!
 Pls, click on the image, to enlarge it, and have fun,

Have a great day, drive safe,

kk

LOL, here, to Aquarius..sounds a great day!:
-"your horoscopes for Mon 22, January 2007!
Aquarius (Jan21-Feb19)
You won't have to go far if you're looking for some excitement. More than enough is going on around you to provide you with all the entertainment you need. Despite all this feverish activity not a lot is accomplished. Everyday tasks or occupations will be put aside in favour of something else that crops up. This pattern is repeated throughout the day."

I'l have a great Monday huh? Hope so , i'm feeling it already, soon i'l be sun-dancing lol, or crying
-" If it feels like an "off-day," Carla, try not to let it get you down. You might find your thoughts and imagination all over the place today. But keep in mind that not every day has to be super-productive. Just take things as they come and everything should go well. Keep projects that take a lot of focus on the back burner if you can to avoid feeling overwhelmed or frustrated."
...They say: "my imagination all over the place today"..but i feel it always like that, !
Wish you have a great day,

kk

Let's cheer up, i'm also fed-up because it's monday, but soon i'l forget it, and i'l enjoy the day as it is

xxx
kk

Beautiful..! i think. Well, are not usual nowadays, these boats.
This boat is a traditional boat, called " Barco Rebelo ", used in the past to carry port wine barrils to the caves in Ribeira area of the embankment of Douro River, where it would grow old and sold on to the wine trade.

Have a nice evenning,

kk

"THE WORM":
There is a wonderful little story about two monks who lived together in a monastery for many years; they were great friends. Then they died within a few months of one another. One of them got reborn in the heaven realms, the other monk got reborn as a worm in a dung pile. The one up in the heaven realms was having a wonderful time, enjoying all the heavenly pleasures. But he started thinking about his friend, "I wonder where my old mate has gone?" So he scanned all of the heaven realms, but could not find a trace of his friend. Then he scanned the realm of human beings, but he could not see any trace of his friend there, so he looked in the realm of animals and then of insects. Finally he found him, reborn as a worm in a dung pile... Wow! He thought: "I am going to help my friend. I am going to go down there to that dung pile and take him up to the heavenly realm so he too can enjoy the heavenly pleasures and bliss of living in these wonderful realms."
So he went down to the dung pile and called his mate. And the little worm wriggled out and said: "Who are you?", "I am your friend. We used to be monks together in a past life, and I have come up to take you to the heaven realms where life is wonderful and blissful." But the worm said: "Go away, get lost!" "But I am your friend, and I live in the heaven realms," and he described the heaven realms to him. But the worm said: "No thank you, I am quite happy here in my dung pile. Please go away." Then the heavenly being thought: "Well if I could only just grab hold of him and take him up to the heaven realms, he could see for himself." So he grabbed hold of the worm and started tugging at him; and the harder he tugged, the harder that worm clung to his pile of dung.

-Do you get the moral of the story? How many of us are attached to our pile of dung?

- Buddhist story, by Ajahn Brahmavamso

.. Laptop crashed last Wednesday, while i was trying have some fun around the blogland Now is ok, but seems lots happened while i was away! UK have been under a huge storm, btw i do hope you are all fine, Liverpool won yesterday, and soon i'l be more up-dated about all you.
Amazing, this weather, here i'm living a kind of Spring, sunny days with warm temperatures, as 15+ and 18+D.!!
Wish you all a happy Sunday,
xx
kk

 That's how my Elvis thinks and acts! I'm sure, everyday when my dad arrives home, goes right away in the direction of his bed and to the living-room's couches to touch all so he knows if is/are warm and then shouts to poor Elvis, saying: " you've been there, while i was out, naughty you, now no snacks"! What a mad attitude he decided to have everyday towards the poor doggy!
LOL, now:
Elvis's thoughts: " Who was it that decided some couches are off limits? The couch here would be perfect for an afternoon dog nap yet I've been shunned...( yeah, right - I can jump off this thingy before anyone notices. ) "

Btw, he owns this one, yes he has his own couch... just he loves the others as well  Here he is smiling, as if saying yes:

 Have a nice afternoon, and give your pet his own couch
They deserve it,..but anyway they know!!! Because as Elvis does, they jump off it before we seem them or notice it, so cute they are with that look as if is nothing to do with them, haha,
xx
kk

:D
Have FUN

kk

...just RIGHT! Better we do exercises , than do diets ! Garfield's so right here


kk

More Lisboa/Dakar Photos, i took while they were all parked, ready2go, here in Lisbon on the day 5's evening ( Jan. ) before their departure :

And:



And i have lots yet to post or share with you, because, lol, i really didn't miss nothing!
Enjoy these ones, yes was a great pleasure be nearby these trucks, cars, and bikes, knowing the adventure all were about to start on the day after!
Btw, among the first 10 there's 1 portuguese, Carlos Sousa in 7th place, and also on bikes we have one among the 10 top first one  ..and where are you english??? None on top 10's cars and bikes! Dunno about trucks yet, i'l check it out later.
Hope you enjoy, please click on each image to enlarge it,
xx
kk

"The Blind Men and the Elephant"
A number of disciples went to the Buddha and said, "Sir, there are living here in Savatthi many wandering hermits and scholars who indulge in constant dispute, some saying that the world is infinite and eternal and others that it is finite and not eternal, some saying that the soul dies with the body and others that it lives on forever, and so forth. What, Sir, would you say concerning them?"

The Buddha answered, "Once upon a time there was a certain raja who called to his servant and said, 'Come, good fellow, go and gather together in one place all the men of Savatthi who were born blind... and show them an elephant.' 'Very good, sire,' replied the servant, and he did as he was told. He said to the blind men assembled there, 'Here is an elephant,' and to one man he presented the head of the elephant, to another its ears, to another a tusk, to another the trunk, the foot, back, tail, and tuft of the tail, saying to each one that that was the elephant.

"When the blind men had felt the elephant, the raja went to each of them and said to each, 'Well, blind man, have you seen the elephant? Tell me, what sort of thing is an elephant?'

"Thereupon the men who were presented with the head answered, 'Sire, an elephant is like a pot.' And the men who had observed the ear replied, 'An elephant is like a winnowing basket.' Those who had been presented with a tusk said it was a ploughshare. Those who knew only the trunk said it was a plough; others said the body was a grainery; the foot, a pillar; the back, a mortar; the tail, a pestle, the tuft of the tail, a brush.

"Then they began to quarrel, shouting, 'Yes it is!' 'No, it is not!' 'An elephant is not that!' 'Yes, it's like that!' and so on, till they came to blows over the matter.

"Brethren, the raja was delighted with the scene.

"Just so are these preachers and scholars holding various views blind and unseeing.... In their ignorance they ar